Yup, that's right, I am starting the hHCG diet today. The HCG diet is harder to get than I first thought it was. In order to get the HCG drops or injections you either need a Rx or to buy from overseas (namely India). I didn't really want to wait until I find a Dr. (there is apparently a several month waiting list) and my husband was completely against me buying the stuff from India (oddly enough, I would be fine with that option, even though I would be mixing and injecting it myself). There is a third and more expensive option, and that is going to a weight loss clinic. They tack on additional fees for "coaching" and "guidance" so they end up being even more expensive than going to a medical doctor. From what I could find, the cost of going to a weight loss clinic varies in price from $500 to $2,000 per round (40 days/injections or 34lbs, whichever comes first).
Since the real HCG diet is not really an option for me, I will be doing the homeopathic HCG instead. I find it odd that the stuff claims to be HCG and 100% hormone free, odd because HCG is a hormone. Obviously the stuff isn't real HCG, but more or less is just an appetite suppressant with other herbs and who knows what else. Coupled with the strict 500 calorie diet, this is basically just a semi-starvation diet that gets pretty darn close to fasting. It is extremely low calorie, carb, and fat. Basically it is no breakfast besides tea or coffee (sweetened with Stevia) lunch and dinner are the same (you have to eat exactly the same thing for supper as you have for lunch that day) and consist of a 3.5 oz piece of extra lean protein and one vegetable. There are two snacks a day (can also be eaten with a meal if preferred) each consisting of one apple and one bread stick or Melba toast. Before you start this super low everything diet, you have a two day period of what is referred to as "loading days." During this time you are supposed to stuff yourself with as much fatty foods as you can. I understand the reasoning behind this with a true HCG diet (to build your stores of structural fat, iron, and protein), but am not convinced it matters much when not even taking the hormone.
Why am I choosing to do this? Good question! Honestly, I am doing this to get myself on the right track again. I don't seem to be able to control my eating habits when I get depressed, which is kinda crappy since eating junk further depresses me. When there is a lot of stress in my life or a lot of strife within my marriage I become extremely depressed. When I am in that state I crave sugar and starches like my survival depends upon me consuming that junk, which in a way it does. What I mean by that is that when I am extremely depressed the endorphins and "high" that comes from eating those "comfort" foods is about the only thing that brings me relief from the depression (albeit for a short period of time). I can recognize that these cravings help steer me away from suicide and self destruction, even though they are damaging to me at the same time. It is kind of like the lesser of two evils at the moment when my depression is severe. I have survived for many years through some very traumatic situations through the comfort of starchy and sugary foods. I try to rely on other comforts and coping methods, but they only work for a certain amount of stress and pain. Once I fall into the spiral of toxic eating, it is very hard to climb back out again. The more sugar one consumes, the more you crave. Sugar is addictive and actually stimulates the same area of the brain that heroine, alcohol, and smoking does. I am doing this diet to break myself out of the spiral or bad eating, kinda like a dietary slap to the face.
My plan is to do this diet for 40 days then switch to Atkins. I will go straight from this super low eating to the unlimited eating with no sugars or starches of the Induction phase of Atkins for 3 weeks (the induction phase of Atkins is nearly identical to the next stage of the HCG diet) then I will move into the OWL (ongoing weight loss) phase of Atkins (which again, is nearly identical to the lifelong maintenance stage of HCG). I will stay in OWL until I reach my goal weight of 150 lbs (or until I can't lose excess weight anymore, be it 130 lbs or 160 lbs. I want to be healthy.)
If for some reason I do not manage to lose the weight I hope to (about 30 lbs is my goal) then I will seriously consider going to the weight loss clinic as long as the prices are not extreme. I need to break the cycle and I need to get healthy. If I could have managed to stay on the low carb lifestyle I would have been fine, and I never would have had any problem with it if it hadn't been for a string of very bad fights with my husband. Low carb is actually very easy to stick to and a satisfying lifestyle, however nothing can withstand the depression that fallows a huge blowout with my husband.
I would say I am optimistic about losing my goal weight. I will be aiming for .75 lbs per day, which is a lot but not unfathomable. I will not be disappointed at all if I lose half a pound a day, or even a little less than that. I don't really expect this to be easy at all, so it helps that this is a short term thing. I know that I will be losing muscle and structural fat as well as abnormal fat. I hope to restore the lost muscle and structural fat during the induction phase of Atkins. It doesn't matter a whole lot if I lose some muscle mass, because it's not like I am trying to build muscle right now anyway. The worry comes from the possibility of organ cannibalism, but that shouldn't happen in such a short amount of time (otherwise I wouldn't even attempt this. Also I feel it is important to point out that using real HCG protects your muscle and forces just the excess fat stores to be burned for fuel). Some people claim hHCG is no better than snake oil, other people claim it is just as effective as the real deal. Who knows, but I'll find out how it works for me at least.
Before getting started today, I weighed and measured myself. Tomorrow my order from Amazon will get here, so I will have fat calipers to measure my body fat %, as well as a food scale for measuring my proteins. I hate measuring myself, it is always so depressing. I hadn't weighed myself in a while either, and the poor eating really packed on the pounds. My weight starting this diet is exactly 215 lbs, yikes! On this plan, I will be weighing myself every day to track progress and help correct stalls and whatnot soon. I won't list all of my measurements, just the basic two, waist and hips. My waist measurement is 42" (keep in mind that I am pretty bloated at the moment, and this measurement will likely go down quickly because of decreasing the bloating and not because of fat loss) and my hips measure 46" around. I will be measuring weekly and hopefully seeing good progress during the 40 day period. I doubt I will update every single day, but I hope to update on my progress often. I may end up posting a couple times a week if I hit rough patches, though my aim is to post daily (see, I am being realistic here in doubting I can stick to daily posts).
Sunday will be my first day on the low calorie part, otherwise known as VLCD#1 (very low calorie diet, day 1). At the same time my husband plans to start back with low-carbing. We are going to see who loses more weight, though I already know it will be him since he always loses weight faster and easier than I do. I already know it will be torture eating grilled chicken and lettuce while he is eating meat loaf, lol I hope to have him help me with my before picture either tonight or tomorrow. I am always confused when it comes to taking before pictures. You see other people taking theirs in their underwear, which I really do not want to do, lol Also don't really have any workout clothes to wear, don't want to wear leggings as they shrink my legs some and it wouldn't be a fair representation of my fatness. I'll probably just end up wearing what I do most days in the end, but it seems like there should be a good choice that I just don't see yet, lol
It is near the end of day one, and I feel like a pig. I was looking forward to eating whatever I wanted, but it actually has just been sort of gross. Not sure why, but the cheese burgers don't even taste good, and I really really like cheese burgers. I almost don't want to do tomorrow as a load day, but I am committed to following this to a T, so I'm just gonna have to suck it up and do it anyway. I think I will go drink a bunch of water now, that is the only thing that sounds good at the moment and I need to start increasing my water intake anyway. I will try to post more tomorrow about the hHCG drops I am using and how I am using them. I am predicting my weight will be at 218 tomorrow; that's just what I am expecting to see on the scale.
Since the real HCG diet is not really an option for me, I will be doing the homeopathic HCG instead. I find it odd that the stuff claims to be HCG and 100% hormone free, odd because HCG is a hormone. Obviously the stuff isn't real HCG, but more or less is just an appetite suppressant with other herbs and who knows what else. Coupled with the strict 500 calorie diet, this is basically just a semi-starvation diet that gets pretty darn close to fasting. It is extremely low calorie, carb, and fat. Basically it is no breakfast besides tea or coffee (sweetened with Stevia) lunch and dinner are the same (you have to eat exactly the same thing for supper as you have for lunch that day) and consist of a 3.5 oz piece of extra lean protein and one vegetable. There are two snacks a day (can also be eaten with a meal if preferred) each consisting of one apple and one bread stick or Melba toast. Before you start this super low everything diet, you have a two day period of what is referred to as "loading days." During this time you are supposed to stuff yourself with as much fatty foods as you can. I understand the reasoning behind this with a true HCG diet (to build your stores of structural fat, iron, and protein), but am not convinced it matters much when not even taking the hormone.
Why am I choosing to do this? Good question! Honestly, I am doing this to get myself on the right track again. I don't seem to be able to control my eating habits when I get depressed, which is kinda crappy since eating junk further depresses me. When there is a lot of stress in my life or a lot of strife within my marriage I become extremely depressed. When I am in that state I crave sugar and starches like my survival depends upon me consuming that junk, which in a way it does. What I mean by that is that when I am extremely depressed the endorphins and "high" that comes from eating those "comfort" foods is about the only thing that brings me relief from the depression (albeit for a short period of time). I can recognize that these cravings help steer me away from suicide and self destruction, even though they are damaging to me at the same time. It is kind of like the lesser of two evils at the moment when my depression is severe. I have survived for many years through some very traumatic situations through the comfort of starchy and sugary foods. I try to rely on other comforts and coping methods, but they only work for a certain amount of stress and pain. Once I fall into the spiral of toxic eating, it is very hard to climb back out again. The more sugar one consumes, the more you crave. Sugar is addictive and actually stimulates the same area of the brain that heroine, alcohol, and smoking does. I am doing this diet to break myself out of the spiral or bad eating, kinda like a dietary slap to the face.
My plan is to do this diet for 40 days then switch to Atkins. I will go straight from this super low eating to the unlimited eating with no sugars or starches of the Induction phase of Atkins for 3 weeks (the induction phase of Atkins is nearly identical to the next stage of the HCG diet) then I will move into the OWL (ongoing weight loss) phase of Atkins (which again, is nearly identical to the lifelong maintenance stage of HCG). I will stay in OWL until I reach my goal weight of 150 lbs (or until I can't lose excess weight anymore, be it 130 lbs or 160 lbs. I want to be healthy.)
If for some reason I do not manage to lose the weight I hope to (about 30 lbs is my goal) then I will seriously consider going to the weight loss clinic as long as the prices are not extreme. I need to break the cycle and I need to get healthy. If I could have managed to stay on the low carb lifestyle I would have been fine, and I never would have had any problem with it if it hadn't been for a string of very bad fights with my husband. Low carb is actually very easy to stick to and a satisfying lifestyle, however nothing can withstand the depression that fallows a huge blowout with my husband.
I would say I am optimistic about losing my goal weight. I will be aiming for .75 lbs per day, which is a lot but not unfathomable. I will not be disappointed at all if I lose half a pound a day, or even a little less than that. I don't really expect this to be easy at all, so it helps that this is a short term thing. I know that I will be losing muscle and structural fat as well as abnormal fat. I hope to restore the lost muscle and structural fat during the induction phase of Atkins. It doesn't matter a whole lot if I lose some muscle mass, because it's not like I am trying to build muscle right now anyway. The worry comes from the possibility of organ cannibalism, but that shouldn't happen in such a short amount of time (otherwise I wouldn't even attempt this. Also I feel it is important to point out that using real HCG protects your muscle and forces just the excess fat stores to be burned for fuel). Some people claim hHCG is no better than snake oil, other people claim it is just as effective as the real deal. Who knows, but I'll find out how it works for me at least.
Before getting started today, I weighed and measured myself. Tomorrow my order from Amazon will get here, so I will have fat calipers to measure my body fat %, as well as a food scale for measuring my proteins. I hate measuring myself, it is always so depressing. I hadn't weighed myself in a while either, and the poor eating really packed on the pounds. My weight starting this diet is exactly 215 lbs, yikes! On this plan, I will be weighing myself every day to track progress and help correct stalls and whatnot soon. I won't list all of my measurements, just the basic two, waist and hips. My waist measurement is 42" (keep in mind that I am pretty bloated at the moment, and this measurement will likely go down quickly because of decreasing the bloating and not because of fat loss) and my hips measure 46" around. I will be measuring weekly and hopefully seeing good progress during the 40 day period. I doubt I will update every single day, but I hope to update on my progress often. I may end up posting a couple times a week if I hit rough patches, though my aim is to post daily (see, I am being realistic here in doubting I can stick to daily posts).
Sunday will be my first day on the low calorie part, otherwise known as VLCD#1 (very low calorie diet, day 1). At the same time my husband plans to start back with low-carbing. We are going to see who loses more weight, though I already know it will be him since he always loses weight faster and easier than I do. I already know it will be torture eating grilled chicken and lettuce while he is eating meat loaf, lol I hope to have him help me with my before picture either tonight or tomorrow. I am always confused when it comes to taking before pictures. You see other people taking theirs in their underwear, which I really do not want to do, lol Also don't really have any workout clothes to wear, don't want to wear leggings as they shrink my legs some and it wouldn't be a fair representation of my fatness. I'll probably just end up wearing what I do most days in the end, but it seems like there should be a good choice that I just don't see yet, lol
It is near the end of day one, and I feel like a pig. I was looking forward to eating whatever I wanted, but it actually has just been sort of gross. Not sure why, but the cheese burgers don't even taste good, and I really really like cheese burgers. I almost don't want to do tomorrow as a load day, but I am committed to following this to a T, so I'm just gonna have to suck it up and do it anyway. I think I will go drink a bunch of water now, that is the only thing that sounds good at the moment and I need to start increasing my water intake anyway. I will try to post more tomorrow about the hHCG drops I am using and how I am using them. I am predicting my weight will be at 218 tomorrow; that's just what I am expecting to see on the scale.
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